If I wrote an autobiography, it would be confusing.
It would be hard to keep track of, hard to keep up with.
Filled with un-needed and un-intended drama.
It would be filled with a lot of nonsensical nonsense--
It would be filled with Rob, Yazz, Adrian, Brian, America, Vince (Victor/Vicktor), Quincy, Dwayne, Dave, Mom, and Dad, and sibling(s), Ben, Jon, Kyoki-san...
It would be filled with my cats, my cousins, my uncles and aunts, my parents, my friends, my sister.
It would be filled with in-jokes that no one would understand.
It would be filled to the brim with metaphors that don't make sense, spelling errors and grammatical errors.
It would be filled with quotes from Movies, Actors/Actresses, Television Shows, Common Sense, Proverbs, Religions.
It would be filled with my day-to-day life (and how boring I think it is).
It would be filled with all the accidents I've had -- Getting hit by a motorbike, falling off a swing and not being able to breathe, getting my head cut on a coffee table when I was three, getting cut by a glass window when I was six...
It would be filled with nostalgic memories of when I used to go to my cousins' house every important catholic holiday we had (Christmas and Thanksgiving were the two most prominent ones we used to enjoy)
It would be filled with all the awkward times I spent alone, and with friends
It would be filled with both hate and love. You'd actually think there was more hate than love, but there isn't. Hate is just easier to express in words.
It would be filled with music, and chaos.
It would be filled with my views, my values, my choices, my decisions (be it right or wrong);
It would be filled with "OMG!"'s and "Jeez, really?" and "No, Jen... no."
It would be boring.
It would be exciting.
It would be fun.
It would be nauseous.
It would be extravagant - but not elegant.
It wouldn't be sexy.
It wouldn't be hot.
It wouldn't be very child-like, either.

It could be filled with memories.
It could be filled with cute, raunchy, scary, incentive.
It could be filled with things that I wanted to happen, but didn't.
It could be filled with unrealistic wishes of Marxism, and the end of poverty and hunger, and the fairy-tale that every girl wants to have.
It could be filled with little scenes that I make up in my head,
I could even make it into a fairy-tale, if I wanted to.

If I wrote a autobiography, it would be filled with crazy.
But I don't plan on writing a Bibliography, really.
I don't plan on going back and thinking about everything I've experienced in some form of nostalgia,
I don't plan on going back and writing about them, either.
That's kind of why I have my journal. In fact, it's the main reason I have my journal.
I am tired. It's not very nice outside, there's a pretty large overcast. All gray and cloudy with "tiny" patches of blue-sky peering through the clouds. It's also chilly.

I'm a sucker for cute/sad stories.  I'll get all teary-eyed, and start to cry really, really easily. Something Like this would make me cry: Like I said, I'm a sucker for sap-stories.

My life lately has been everything but boring, if you want the truth. Albeit I'm one of those people who define 'boring' as a regular kid who goes to school, sees their friends and doesn't do anything out of the ordinary. Something like Volunteer work is extremely amazing to me at times, and something like a fire in a building close will get me all excited and worried and talking about it, conjuring up theories of how it started or thinking about things like the metro going under-water and making the train water-proof.

I don't act my own age a lot of the time, either. I'm an 18 year old half asian half european female, born and raised in Montreal Quebec who resides in a little part of the city known as Verdun, going to her first semester of college after a year long break.
How exciting does that sound? That's the point, it doesn't sound very exciting at all. If I were to act my age, I'd have to act like... I'd have to be someone else, is what I'm trying to say. I'd act my age. I'd act like a girl. Then I'd act like an 18 year old girl. I'd act Asian and European. I'd be acting like an 18 year old, Azn-Euro female. Oh, and don't forget, Montreal is a media centre for quite a few things, apparently fashion included. So I'd be way out of my comfort zone, really.
Do you see where I'm going with this?
If I were to act my own age, I'd be acting, not being myself.
Excuse my language if you so choose to do so, but fuck that. I'm Jen, Jennifer, Jennars, even. I'm not your typical, average every-day girl. I've got my share of drama-induced friendships and relationships. I like different things. I like technology, and gadgets that are useless, and video-games, and computers, and science of certain things, and camp-fires, and food, and... I like a lot of things that an average every-day girl doesn't. I'm not going to change, or act my own age just for someone else to appease them. If you want me to act my own age, I'll just shut up. Fine, I'll stop talking, I get the point, you're embarassed to be around me because I'm happy going off on a tangent about something that doesn't even make sense. *sighs*

My life has been everything but boring, lately. I'm in a rut with my best friend. There is a lot going on in his head, and he won't tell me a thing, so I can't really do anything about it. I know he's worried, I know I'm worried, but nothing is being said, and I don't know why. I don't really know where to start. I manage to spend time with everyone else but him, somehow.

I'd be lying if I said I knew what I was doing all the time, but I'd be lying if I said I didn't know what I was doing all the time.