Oh my gosh! Just me going off, again. ^^
( 2 Am and I'm still awake, writing a song... )

Sometime in October, I wrote a letter to Yazz. It was when I really wasn't doing well, and shit with friends was messing me up completely. *shakes her head and rolls her eyes* It's all in blue, and it's in a green notebook in my sac d'ecole currently. I opened it during class one time, took a peak, and the first line I read was something along the lines of: "And I was looking at you, gazing into your eyes and wondering "Why hasn't he left yet? He told me he was going to leave."  but you didn't, you stayed, Yazz. You stayed." and then I closed it and I was probably blushing.

There's not a day that I go without stating to myself and someone that I love you. There's not been one time where I've ever taken "You're beautiful" for granted. And if you're looking into my eyes while we're just laying somewhere and you're either beside me or on top of me, and you tell me that you love me, I swear I'm dreaming.

That all sounds really cheesy, and I'm not done yet! ;D 

So, I've realized that you actually do have a certain look that I rarely see, or rather rarely choose to see. You did it once on New Years, and once while we were at the hill park. You usually have your glasses on, and it really is a certain look that I can only point when you have them on (for some odd reason). You've done it twice, maybe three times that I've noticed, and I could swear I died inside because I was so damn happy.

It's when you've got your glasses on, and you're looking at me with a smile. And it's not just any smile, it's a: "Jen you are beautiful and I love you so god damn much it's driving me crazy" smile. Not sexual kind of crazy, just... crazy, kind of crazy. And when you do it I know, because I get so shy and I blush so much that I can't make eye contact with you when you're looking at me like that. I can, but for a very brief moment. And then I just have to kiss you because I don't know what else to do. I really, really don't. *scratches her head with a blush in her cheeks and a slight smile on her face* 

I hold my breath when I think of you sometimes. Because when I'm light headed it is the best experience I have ever had. It's why I don't mind the choking", unless I can't breathe. Blood restriction is perfectly fine to me.

*tilts her head* You'll be the catalyst

I'm talking to Yazz over MSN (or, was) and we're just talking about things we usually talk of, things involving each other. If you didn't know, Friday we ended up making out over a couch and falling off of it. It was one of those one seaters, so it wasn't exactly a couch, more like a very comfortable chair. That we fell off of. Probably because of me. XD And at the moment, since it's still "Fresh", I kind of "have" to laugh whenever I think about it. If there was ever an actual movie guy that I know in terms of cute-chick-flick-romantic-moments, he's the guy (so far).

There was this one time we were walking hand in hand down Réné-Lévesque, after work, and he turned to tackle-hug-cling, but it was expected and earlier that day he had told me he had a dream of us kissing, so I was expecting that to happen. And obviously that didn't happen. XD *smiles and rubs her eyes* I was taken aback (quite literally), and then it was a little awkwards.

You know, this year wasn't that bad. In fact it's been more or less a regular - if anything - better year that most.
Wow, I really just said that. XD

That being said, Life's damn awesome right now.